The Ugly Side of Ego

Letting go of my ego/pride is one of the most difficult things I’ve been learning to deal with.  This is especially more difficult when you feel like you are being attacked (either someone attacking your character or an idea you have) even though part of you know that you are in the wrong.  My natural inclination is to fight back even if I know I don’t have a leg to stand on.  Rather than admit that perhaps I might have been wrong I rather be obstinate and unreasonable than to let go of my ego and do what’s best in that situation.  In these kinds of situations the best solution is to always to do the most logical thing, but my pride says otherwise.  I think this stems from my own insecurities.  A feeling that if I’m wrong and someone else is right that somehow or another my own value as a person diminishes.  Looking at it this way you can see how this is absurd, but yet I know that this is how I think.  So the solution should be to not look at life as a scoreboard…keeping track how often I am right or wrong versus someone else.  At the end of the day it’s more important that we make the right decisions that benefit whatever task at hand we are aiming to achieve.  Looking at it this way we should welcome other opinions and always strive to find the best answer.  I think humility plays a part in this as well.  I think if I focus on humility and realizing that I’m not always right will help me keep an open mind to better solutions and greater opportunities.  So what if I’m wrong, right?

I’m at a whopping 55 days sober now. Woo hoo!  I should have had some celebration for my 50th day.  Percentage wise that means I am 15.1% done with the sober challenge.

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